I Hate X'Mas

Don't get me wrong. The season of giving, joy and goodwill is way up on my list of favourite days of the year. It is, in fact, SPECIAL to me. It is the ONE day in the year, Edmund, the chronic alcohol and loud music addict staunchly refuses to club.

No, I don't hate Christmas. I hate X'mas.

I actually get peeved when people use Xmas instead of Christmas. Call me a traditionalist, but I believe that there are some things that should not be sacrificed to the god of expediency and modern efficiency.

Nope, some things are inviolate in my book. Christmas will remain Christmas and the only mixers good whiskey should have, is a dash of warm water or a couple of cubes of ice.

Thus endeth the sermon.

PS. Oh, and Merry Christmas everyone.

PPS. Take time off and remember your loved ones, do something meaningful. Even if it is just before drinking yourself silly.

PPS. The free hugs campaign is GO. City Hall if wet weather, Orchard if not. If you are not sure where I am, CALL ME.

If I was Principal..

Yeah yeah, I know. It's the middle of the frigging school holidays. Bah, humbug.

In any case, here's an idea of what students should be taught in school in lieu of A-Maths, which you don't use, cos you have frigging excel anyway.

Principles of Complaining - Cutting through the red tape and getting your way with rude customer service types in 15 minutes or less.

Management management - Dealing with stupid bosses, and working with brain-dead corporate types.

Speed Reading (Basic/Intermediate/Advanced) - Sifting through half a ton of reporting dross for a grain of relevant information

Small Talk 101 - For all your socializing needs

Basic Flirting - Required syllabus, Small Talk 101. Going beyond lame pick-up lines

What Women Want - Or Unexplained Mysteries. Optional cirriculum. Degree in Advanced Metaphysics and/or PhD in Philosophy good to have.

What Men Want - Or, Alcohol, Sex and full contact sports. NC-16 for violence, explicit content and inappropriate language.

Any other courses or additional modules?

Scent of a Woman

And THIS, gentlemen, is how it is done. Oh, and the dance is pretty good too.

It's My Party - Let 'er Rip, Part Tres!

Not as much as Chin in the auction, but I DID get tips.

Not exactly my good side, and Pink isn't exactly my colour.

Getting into the spirit of things.

Party ON!

All in all a brilliant party, and thank you, ALL of you who made it possible. The people that helped organized it, Funky-T for kicking farking ASS on the decks, and each and every one of you that came.

And for those of you that did NOT make it, you have no excuses next year!

PS. the REALLY interesting pictures (and the NC-18 ones), send $$ to me and I'll think about releasing it.

PPS. Here are the Other Parts to the post.

• The Prelude
• Let 'er Rip, Part I
• Let 'er Rip, Part II

It's my Party - Let 'er Rip, Part Dos!

Borat was at my party. Actually these folks I just met at New Asia the night before.

A Rose, by any other name...

The requisite cake-blowing

What do you mean my speech sucked? You try talking coherently after 15 shots.

And then they decided to auction Chin off.

Jacking up the price.

Bringing the price through the roof

Somehow, it didn't work as well for me.

It's My Party - Let 'er Rip Part Uno!

And then, the guests arrived.

Taking photos with beautiful women - Shirley, Jasmine, Cat, Angela and yours Truly

The price of taking photos with beautiful women

Chin's friends

Puker up, Joyce!

Now how many times must I tell you all, WHISKEY shots. NOT Tequila. Get with the program.

I have grown another head, this one much prettier than my usual one.

When it comes to getting the Party Started. Free flow is ALWAYS good

Jarrod and his lady, Crazy white dude, and his chica.

It's My Party I - Prelude

Well, not exactly, but here are some of the pictures from the crazy ass Fuschia party that marked both Chinfee, and my birthday.

Barf bags ready... Here goes nothing.

Funky-T, Jasmine, Andrew and me (sober)

Chin's friends

Now what EXACTLY is Angela doing to Cat???

Mah Nigga checking out da Decks and da sound.

The Calm before the storm

And then, all of high heaven, hell and everything in between broke loose...

Simple Rules to Live By

I have had this told to me, or overheard in the long hiatus that I have been away from blogging.

Simple truths, but I'm right now at a stage where keeping it simple is probably the best way to go, and the hardest things to do.

1. While you still have the energy, work. And give value to the people around you.
2. In everything that you do, do YOUR best, regardless of the circumstances.
3. Overheard. "I know I can survive anywhere and do anything. Because whatever I do, and I know I can do an EXCELLENT job."
4. Be Yourself.

Simple rules aren't they? I'm sure they fit in between rule #1 and #2347. Now to find where they fit.

In retrospect, after my birthday, I have found that I have changed somewhat over the last year or so. I think I'll have to go back and re-evaluate who I am again. Time for a year-end review?

Patience

The pictures for my birthday will be out soon enough, ladies and gentlemen.

You will see me in a pink dress. There will be pictures of me getting buzzed and happy. Bear with me, while the owner of this blog finds means by which to upload more terrifying moments of that truly memorable night...

Simple rules to live by.

Rule No. 1 to living a happy life : Breathe in.

Rule No. 2: Breathe Out.

Rule No. 2347: Never refuse a mint. Ever.

For The Truly Inane

This is a super time waster.

Warning: Senseless violence and carnage galore